During my stay in Chennai, I
had a maid for a short period of time for cleaning the house and
utensils. She used to come pretty well dressed up and looked really tidy. She
had 3 kids, her husband worked in a shoe store and they stayed in a
locality near my house. Since she could speak Hindi so we used to often
have chats while she finished her work. She sounded quite happy and contented
with her life and her family.
It had been 4 months of her duty at my home, when one morning
she came for work with tears in her eyes and kind of shattered state. I
enquired the reason for it and she broke out saying her husband had beaten her
badly over some argument between them. Well, she dint wish to disclose the
story behind the argument and I also dint force her. Whatever be the reason,
but who gives a man the right to beat up his wife? Does he consider it his
right being a husband? I asked her if it was the first time this had happened
and she meekly replied that it had happened 3-4 times earlier as well. The couple
often had fights amongst them. Her husband was not jobless, did not drink or
have any other bad vices. But he always expected her to act as per his will and would
loose his temper easily if she dint oblige and ended up showing his manliness
in the manner he had done that day. Her in-laws were not supportive, as
expected. I asked her if she ever revolted to all this beating business? She
said that she has always raised her voice against it, but since she has married
this man so she has to carry on the relationship her whole life. Their society
does not allow separation between a husband and wife and she will have to
answer everyone her whole life if she walks out from his house. Moreover, for
her kids future she has to carry on the burden of this marriage. I was really
saddened at her state but could not do anything at that moment to lessen her
pain other than giving her few comforting and encouraging words. Never had I earlier
felt that she was going through all trauma considering how happy she used to
appear all this time. Well, women are expert at putting up false image, or
maybe her smiles were to hide her agony from the outside world.
After she was done with her work she left. Then within a
minute, she rang the doorbell again. I asked her if she forgot something or
wanted to talk about something. She said that she had taken head bath that day
and since she left house in a hurry due to the fight, so she forgot to apply
the vermilion on her head. She wanted to borrow my red lipstick which she could
use it as vermilion. I asked the significance of applying it when her marriage
itself was in jeopardy. She said its her marriage symbol and she cannot part
with it irrespective of how her husband treats her. I have never been able to
understand these sentiments that surround a woman. The lady’s life was miserable,
she had no love or feelings for her husband, had no support of her in-laws and
yet was so sentimental about the vermilion. It was her marriage symbol after
all!!
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